“Who’s messing around with romantic courtship?” - do we forget how to do it?

The current generation which grew up in the new technology age is in a higher risk of miscommunication and conflict, which may result in a high number of divorces, says Thom Patterson on Cnn. His article “Who’s messing around with romantic courtship?” explains how the traditional model of romantic courtship is fading. (Patterson, 2012)

Patterson gives on example which says it all: “real kisses are often replaced by cell keystrokes like KOTL.”  (Patterson, 2012)  Do you have any idea what it means – kiss on the lips. If you use this expression rather often, you should maybe think about how many kisses you would really give as there is a huge gap between an SMS or instant messaging kiss, and the real one.

Danae Matthews, as 20-year blogger, says that we jump into action too quickly. Also various TV shows, such as the Bachelor, where many women compete to get the one man, damage our perception of courtship; it presents it as a race based on performance. "If you go into your relationship thinking it's a performance, you're destined to epic fail, says Josh Levs from CNN. (Patterson, 2012)

Did Facebook kill love letters? Will the next generation realize what they are missing? Or do you want to get a advice, how to get a date in three messages? Go to see the original article on CNN: http://edition.cnn.com/2012/02/13/living/courting-love/index.html?hpt=hp_bn8.

by imtheone

Resources:

Patterson, T. (2012, February 13). Who's messing around with romantic courtship?. Retrieved from     http://edition.cnn.com/2012/02/13/living/courting-love/index.html?hpt=hp_bn8

imtheone. (Producer). (2011). Send me your love.. sms fail. [Web Graphic]. Retrieved from http://www.jokeroo.com/pictures/fail/send-me-your-love..-sms-fail.html

"Mass Media Influences" - a small research about romantic relationships

Cosmopolitan Middle East

I would recommend an article called “Mass Media Influences” which was published at the website of The Georgia Tech which is a School of Literature, Communication and Culture. 

The author created a small survey, which illustrates how people are influenced by the presentation of romance relationship by the media. The author claims that “I will use the word ‘romance’ in this report not so much to connote the images of candlelit dinners and flowers (though they form a part of this definition), but  the general phenomena of exclusive two partner relationships.” (Mass media influences)

In the survey conducted by the author, about 60% of interviewed college students feel that the media do not accurately present romantic relationships. On the contrary, and surprisingly, about 90% of the students admitted, that media do influence their perception of romance itself.

Another interesting research, which was done by the author, is an analysis of magazines’ front covers. Even though only 13 magazines were used, we can get a general idea. According to this research, the readers are most interested in sexuality (including skills and issues), but the least attention is paid to supporting the partner.

More information can be found in the original article here: http://www.lcc.gatech.edu/~herrington/gcp/Ethnology/media_ethn.htm

(I would like to attribute the author, but unfortunately he or she isn’t mentioned anywhere.)

Do you have the same priorities? And how are your priorities in looking for articles related to romance, do you have any preferences? Share your opinion with us!

Resources:

Mass media influences. Informally published manuscript, Georgia Institute of Technology, School of Literature, Communication and Culture, Atlanta, Georgia. Retrieved from http://www.lcc.gatech.edu/~herrington/gcp/Ethnology/media_ethn.html

Celebrity Chatta. (Photographer). (2012). Cosmopolitan Middle East. [Print Photo]. Retrieved from http://celebritychatta.com/tag/cosmopolitan-middle-east-jan-2012/

Confusing messages about love & romance which the mass media send us

Media present us a certain point of view on how the relationships “usually” function. We, as the media consumers, should be aware of this fact, because the repeated “truth” really becomes the truth after some time, or in other words, it becomes a generally accepted way of functioning.

Let’s concentrate on the genre of romantic comedies. Such movies are said to be widely appreciated by women of all ages. The question is: does it leave any impact on the viewers in terms of relationships and romance? The answer is: yes, definitely.

Now, let’s examine some unrealistic messages the media send us.

1. Love at first sight

There is no love at first sight. There might be an attraction, no doubt about it, but not love. Love takes time to develop.  A good example of this “myth” is the recent Twilight series – when Bella first sees Edward, she instantly falls in love with him. As mentioned earlier, in real life, Bella would be attracted to Edward, might think he is hot and sexy, but not fall in love with him.


2. Total opposites

There is a phrase which says: “the opposites attract each other.” In relationship, it might work for a certain (short) period of time, but such relationships don’t usually last long. People having opposite ideas, goals and backgrounds can’t share a life together. An example is the movie Pretty Woman.  Can you imagine Vivian acting in such inappropriate way and still make the Edward fall in love with her? Doesn't work that way…

3. The real love ‘completes’ you

No, it doesn’t. It is often portrayed in fairy tales and Disney movies for children. The princess (for example Cinderella) has to wait for her prince, to rescue her and make all her dreams come true. In reality, a person should complete himself or herself. Take their life to their hands and deal with it.

Here is another interesting video about the so called "Cinderella Syndrome" which basically means that Cinderella is waiting for her prince to come, which gives the idea that girls should wait for their prince. However, in reality, they could be waiting at home for ever, and no one would probably come at all. :)

The article is based on information from Dr. Mary-Lou Galician from Arizona State University. She also shared her ultimate advice: “Get real!”

Are you still interested how to get real? Follow this link: http://www.realisticromance.com/PDFs/QuizRxWeb.pdf

Do you have any personal experience with the three previous points? Do you think they are true? Please share your opinions and experiences with us in comments.

Resources:
Dugas, T. (n.d.). Popular culture and mass media myths. Retrieved from http://ruby.fgcu.edu/courses/tdugas/ids3301/acrobat/romanticlove.pdf