“Who’s messing around with romantic courtship?” - do we forget how to do it?

The current generation which grew up in the new technology age is in a higher risk of miscommunication and conflict, which may result in a high number of divorces, says Thom Patterson on Cnn. His article “Who’s messing around with romantic courtship?” explains how the traditional model of romantic courtship is fading. (Patterson, 2012)

Patterson gives on example which says it all: “real kisses are often replaced by cell keystrokes like KOTL.”  (Patterson, 2012)  Do you have any idea what it means – kiss on the lips. If you use this expression rather often, you should maybe think about how many kisses you would really give as there is a huge gap between an SMS or instant messaging kiss, and the real one.

Danae Matthews, as 20-year blogger, says that we jump into action too quickly. Also various TV shows, such as the Bachelor, where many women compete to get the one man, damage our perception of courtship; it presents it as a race based on performance. "If you go into your relationship thinking it's a performance, you're destined to epic fail, says Josh Levs from CNN. (Patterson, 2012)

Did Facebook kill love letters? Will the next generation realize what they are missing? Or do you want to get a advice, how to get a date in three messages? Go to see the original article on CNN: http://edition.cnn.com/2012/02/13/living/courting-love/index.html?hpt=hp_bn8.

by imtheone

Resources:

Patterson, T. (2012, February 13). Who's messing around with romantic courtship?. Retrieved from     http://edition.cnn.com/2012/02/13/living/courting-love/index.html?hpt=hp_bn8

imtheone. (Producer). (2011). Send me your love.. sms fail. [Web Graphic]. Retrieved from http://www.jokeroo.com/pictures/fail/send-me-your-love..-sms-fail.html

Confusing messages about love & romance which the mass media send us

Media present us a certain point of view on how the relationships “usually” function. We, as the media consumers, should be aware of this fact, because the repeated “truth” really becomes the truth after some time, or in other words, it becomes a generally accepted way of functioning.

Let’s concentrate on the genre of romantic comedies. Such movies are said to be widely appreciated by women of all ages. The question is: does it leave any impact on the viewers in terms of relationships and romance? The answer is: yes, definitely.

Now, let’s examine some unrealistic messages the media send us.

1. Love at first sight

There is no love at first sight. There might be an attraction, no doubt about it, but not love. Love takes time to develop.  A good example of this “myth” is the recent Twilight series – when Bella first sees Edward, she instantly falls in love with him. As mentioned earlier, in real life, Bella would be attracted to Edward, might think he is hot and sexy, but not fall in love with him.


2. Total opposites

There is a phrase which says: “the opposites attract each other.” In relationship, it might work for a certain (short) period of time, but such relationships don’t usually last long. People having opposite ideas, goals and backgrounds can’t share a life together. An example is the movie Pretty Woman.  Can you imagine Vivian acting in such inappropriate way and still make the Edward fall in love with her? Doesn't work that way…

3. The real love ‘completes’ you

No, it doesn’t. It is often portrayed in fairy tales and Disney movies for children. The princess (for example Cinderella) has to wait for her prince, to rescue her and make all her dreams come true. In reality, a person should complete himself or herself. Take their life to their hands and deal with it.

Here is another interesting video about the so called "Cinderella Syndrome" which basically means that Cinderella is waiting for her prince to come, which gives the idea that girls should wait for their prince. However, in reality, they could be waiting at home for ever, and no one would probably come at all. :)

The article is based on information from Dr. Mary-Lou Galician from Arizona State University. She also shared her ultimate advice: “Get real!”

Are you still interested how to get real? Follow this link: http://www.realisticromance.com/PDFs/QuizRxWeb.pdf

Do you have any personal experience with the three previous points? Do you think they are true? Please share your opinions and experiences with us in comments.

Resources:
Dugas, T. (n.d.). Popular culture and mass media myths. Retrieved from http://ruby.fgcu.edu/courses/tdugas/ids3301/acrobat/romanticlove.pdf

Introduction

It is almost a common knowledge that media are affecting us. But what are the effects exactly? Is it that it’s the media which actually decide what are we going to buy for dinner, or what is our fashion style? Or is the impact even deeper and also scarier?

Yes, it is. 

The media in all its forms affect our ideas, opinions, values and even our interpersonal relationships.

Every person is developing constantly and is shaped by the environment. Firstly, the environment is the family, then its friends and co-workers, then our children. However, we still have a tendency to look for a role model who is successful, beautiful and in general fits into box labeled ‘ideal’ which was created by society and media.

Here, I would like to show you how you are affected by media especially in the area of love and romance. Maybe you will learn something interesting and new, and maybe you will even realize and become aware of how easily influenced can we really be.

Welcome to this blog! 
 Lucie

by Jack Marshall